{"id":2382,"date":"2020-05-20T14:04:49","date_gmt":"2020-05-20T06:04:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/?p=2382"},"modified":"2020-05-20T15:04:43","modified_gmt":"2020-05-20T07:04:43","slug":"of-micro-spaces-and-home","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/2020\/05\/20\/of-micro-spaces-and-home\/","title":{"rendered":"Of Micro-Spaces and Home"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

COVID Companions is a series of creative pieces featuring snippets of life during COVID-19, with a special focus on the other individuals or creatures who are keeping us company during quarantine, lockdown, \u2018circuit breaker\u2019, or whatever your equivalent might be. <\/em><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

3 May, 2020<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhere is home\u201d I ask Natasha, my housemate, as we lounge on her bed. It is a Sunday afternoon, half way through Singapore\u2019s COVID-19 \u2018Circuit Breaker\u2019. Natasha is wearing an oversized grey t-shirt and boxer shorts. Her short hair is pulled back with a clip, her face with its characteristic calm and pleasant expression. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHome is right here, with my housemates,\u201d says Natasha (who is ethnically Taiwanese, has an American passport and grew up in Ho Chi Minh city). \u201cIt\u2019s where I pay rent.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I press Natasha further. \u201cWell, when I go back to Vietnam to see my family, I have to get a tourist visa. So that feels like a reminder each time I go back I\u2019m not really supposed to be there.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI guess home is an amalgamation of micro-spaces,\u201d she says. \u201c In Ho Chi Minh city, it\u2019s waking up late on a Sunday and going downstairs. My dad will be playing really loud instrumental music and making an elaborate salad – romaine lettuce, pomelo, chocolate, nuts, peppers\u2026 My mom will be looking at her phone and telling us about the latest health strategy that she thought of.\u201d In Taiwan, it\u2019s waking up late to find my grandpa painting. Once, I remember he was studying a woman in a sports bra from a sportswear magazine. Next thing I knew, he had drawn her into a figure in ancient China\u2026 he said he liked her posture.\u201d  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cTaiwan is the place that, growing up, I felt the most loved and accepted. My mouth literally feels more comfortable when speaking Mandarin. I can come up with comebacks a bit more quickly, and I\u2019m a bit more vulgar. Living as an expat family in Ho Chi Minh city always felt very isolating. I remember once we were on the plane back from Taiwan, and I was very very sad to be leaving my family. I was screaming \u2018Ahhhh! Noooo! Take me back to see Ah-ma!!!!\u2019 and crying very loudly. At some point, my mom, who could really do nothing more to console me, leaned in close to my ear and said \u2018Natasha, do you know what they do to people who cry like this on planes? They shoot them with a tranquilliser.\u2019 I immediately fell silent and sobbed to myself quietly.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Baby Natasha indulges in ice cream<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat about here?\u201d I ask as the afternoon sun streams through Natasha\u2019s sea green curtains. \u201cWhat micro-space in Singapore is home<\/em> for you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIn Singapore, home is waking up late (you\u2019ll notice a trend) on a Sunday. The windows are open because we don\u2019t like to use AirCon. My housemates and I spontaneously gather in the kitchen to make lunch. Suddenly everyone is stirring and turning on and off the stove and shouting \u2018baby, should we add miso?\u2019 \u2018do you want to add miso?\u2019 \u2018i\u2019m afraid it will be under salted!\u2019 \u2018let\u2019s just add Chin-Su later!\u2019 After 45 minutes, we finally make it through. Our dining table always has brightly coloured placemats and a centrepiece with a candle.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI sleep a lot, so I miss about half my housemates’ days,\u201d says Natasha as a matter-of-fact. \u201cSometimes after I wake up at 11am, I\u2019ll eat lunch and afterwards I\u2019ll feel sleepy again and take a nap.\u201d Natasha revels in the ability to sleep during the day, a simple act of resistance against the capitalist notion of productivity that dictates when and how much we should sleep. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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  • \"\"<\/figure><\/li><\/ul>
    What our daily meals have become<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

    With all of this talk of sleep, I notice Natasha\u2019s eyelids starting to droop as she pulls the giant corn-shaped bolster closer to her. In order to keep both of us awake on this lazy Sunday afternoon, I turn the conversation toward Natasha\u2019s love of film.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI love watching things, but my housemates hate it. I\u2019m always asking them to watch things with me. The other night one of them said \u2018maybe\u2026 but I\u2019d prefer that whatever we watch doesn\u2019t have a plot and doesn\u2019t have characters, so I don\u2019t get too involved.\u2019 We ended up watching Planet Earth and getting super involved in the intertwined fates of all of the anthropomorphised sea creatures and mountain cats! My other housemate only watches fitness videos\u2026\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI\u2019m a visual learner,\u201d Natasha explains. \u201cWith film, you can just let go and be carried along for the ride. Some films invite instant reflection and insight, and others have a higher barrier to entry – they require more research and work to really understand the Director\u2019s intention.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    As part of the Singapore International Film Festival\u2019s Youth Critics and Jury Programme, Natasha learned more about the process of making and producing films, and the art of film critique writing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    She specifically enjoyed the film The Seen and Unseen <\/em>by Kamila Andani, which weaves stunning images and dance sequences into a tender narrative about a relationship between a Balinese girl and her very ill younger brother. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cFilm is current, it is alive,\u201d says Natasha, her voice quickening. \u201cIt has to interact with what is going on right now. SGIFF is so great because it is a lot smaller and more accessible than many festivals. It\u2019s important for us to vary our film consumption and support the upcoming film industry of Southeast Asia.\u201d

    When I ask Natasha where she wants to go with her passion for film, she speaks of a regular discussion group that she convenes to discuss short stories and films. The group recently watched Rashomon <\/em>by Akira Kurosawa. \u201cIt\u2019s important that we recognise and celebrate the genius of Asian filmmakers in their own right, rather than constantly referencing the West by saying for example, that \u2018[insert Asian filmmaker name] is the Tarantino of Asia.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    Natasha sketches her housemate<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

    Natasha studied anthropology at a local university. I ask her to explain why, and she tells me of the first anthropology class she ever took – Language,  Culture, and Power <\/em>by the late Professor Barney Bate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cEvery time I walked into that class, my scalp would be numb with excitement. Everything Prof. Bate said changed my worldview completely. His excitement and belief in the value of anthropology was contagious. At the time, it felt like choosing to study it was a decision about identity, it was a choice to take on a lens of the world that seemed much more compassionate than other lenses.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cLooking back, it may have served me well to take more varied courses. I was comfortable with that way of learning already, I should have developed different skill sets – that would make me more employable now. It was such a privilege to just take a bunch of classes that I found super interesting\u2026 But the world just doesn\u2019t work like that.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI wish that I would have taken classes in statistical analysis. But I was hubristic. I did things that were fun. But I should have done more things that were not so fun. That is one life lesson I take away from all of this.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    I ask Natasha whether she might consider a job in academia, given her passion for learning, thinking, writing, and ideating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI\u2019m very intellectually promiscuous,\u201d she says, shaking her head. \u201cIf I wanted to go into academia, I would have to really hone one discipline or research focus. I don\u2019t want to repeat my same mistakes. I\u2019ve had my fun.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    I press Natasha on why she feels life should no longer be fun. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI lack discipline,\u201d she states resolutely. \u201cYou know what I mean, as my housemate. I wake up at 11am. You wake up at 6:30. By 11am you\u2019re wondering what else to do. Then I wake up and I\u2019m still drowsy and I give you a hug. Then I go back to sleep. I\u2019m too indulgent.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cDo you think indulgence gives your life meaning?\u201d I ask. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cIn some ways. It certainly gives me a lot of pleasure.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    I poke further. \u201cWhat\u2019s the meaning of life? Could it be pleasure?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cYou\u2019re walking me into an existential crisis\u2026” she says. “I think it may be partly about pleasure, but you need a balance. I\u2019ve never been balanced. Sometimes I have a lot of hype in my life. I\u2019ll hype myself up about drinking a nice cup of tea. Other times though, I feel very bored. At the end of the day though, after all the hype and all the boredom, I wonder \u2018what did I really achieve?\u2019 \u2018what impact did I have?\u2019. 

    \u201cThere are things that I\u2019m escaping from,” says Natasha, looking down “… like the real world, the news, my future. I\u2019m very myopic, literally and figuratively.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cSome people would call that \u2018present.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cA bit too present.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cWhat is one thing you\u2019re good at?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI\u2019m good at watching TV. I\u2019m good at watching slow films. I\u2019m patient.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cWhat else?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    [silence]<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    I tell Natasha one thing I think she\u2019s good at. She’s brilliant at having fun. She’s skilled at making mundane spaces and processes precious and memorable. I remind her that just yesterday she curated an entire YouTube playlist of karaoke songs and bought cider so that we could have a karaoke night to cheer up our spirits. She\u2019s skilled at bringing pleasure into each moment. She’s mastered the art of delight.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Natasha characteristically deflects the compliment, explaining that she doesn\u2019t deserve any credit, “… No, it’s really my housemates that bring this fun side out of me,” she insists.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cI\u2019m good at having fun when I feel safe,\u201d says Natasha. \u201cI only take ownership of the situation when I feel safe, and I feel safe when the people around me actively support and nurture me. Simple things, but things that are not a given.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Natasha gets up to turn on the fan then comes back to her bed. We both yawn and call to our third housemate to come join a cuddle puddle. Three little kittens, sisters, housemates, friends, fall gently into slumber. A sweet act of collective resistance. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    Cuddle puddle with housemates<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    COVID Companions is a series of creative pieces featuring snippets of life during COVID-19, with a special focus on the other individuals or creatures who are keeping us company during quarantine, lockdown, \u2018circuit breaker\u2019, or whatever your equivalent might be.  3 May, 2020 \u201cWhere is home\u201d I ask Natasha, my housemate, as we lounge on […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":36,"featured_media":2397,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[531],"tags":[536,527,288,526,525,37,535,528,529],"class_list":["post-2382","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-covid-companions","tag-anthropology","tag-circuitbreaker","tag-cooking","tag-covid19","tag-covidcompanions","tag-film","tag-life-stories","tag-lockdown","tag-quarantine"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2382","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/36"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2382"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2382\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2407,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2382\/revisions\/2407"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2397"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brack.sg\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}